That girl,

Friday, May 16, 2008

I came across this picture,

it made me think a lot.

I really missed that day,

Maybe it's not that significant to some,

but yeah, it made me feel super blessed.

:D Lovessss.

I've got a lot of issues, and it's just plainnn disappointing.

ISSUE 1

There have been rumours, 2 of it.

What adds to the disappointment was that it was not from any Tan ah lian or whatever,

it was from one of my so 'close' friend.

Screwww you.

And it's not been the first time, i need my toes to count too, or maybe more?

do you understand, do you get the meaning?

And those are really horrendous,

forget about it, i've already lost that trust in you longggg ago.

Sometimes i really wonder, time and time again,

the same things keep happening, don't you feel guilty?

Don't you feel guilty? Don't you?

I mean to some its really you're Good?

but they haven't thought of how you're telling ppl's stuff around,

and how you end up telling their stuffs in the end.

Tskkk, forget it.

I'm just wasting my space here and wasting my time,

maybe people like you would never learn and realise,

maybe you'll just stay like this forever.

I wouldn't knoww...

Sometimes, i really feel like doing what you did to me,

but i didn't bear to, why?

Simply at least you're my friend and i don't want to see you upset,

or rather i wouldn't want anyone to feel disappointed with me.

If i really did, the world would think i'm wrong,

but has anyone heard my side of the story?

I don't mean i'm perfect or whatever BUT that doesn't mean you're too.

It's just plain disappointment.

Don't you ever realise that your facial expression spells AKWARD when you speak to me.

When you try to hurl sacarsm to me?

Maybe one day, i hope, you'll realise.

I guess this was my fault too, i'm guilty,

guilty of being too soft, guilty of not being able to stand up for myself, guilty for making these choices, guilty of not correcting you guys, guilty of shielding you guys too much, guilty of being a friend, guilty of spoon feeding you all and not making you learn.

All simply because i didn't want to see you guys upset and hurt.

Everything's changing and i don't feel the same.
Enough of this.

ISSUE 2

Well, i'm rather disappointed with what my team is of today.

No offence, you can think my expectations.

after those down's, it been ever since i've seen the team laughed together, cried together.

how we always believed in 'one for all, all for one'

But i can tell from now, those are gonna vanish soon.

Not really welcomed for training, has this been the tradition?

No, and we're the first batch to experience this.

How you tried to tell us to come back once a week

and the other makes plan for us not to turn up for any more.

How disappointing can this get,

now i've lost that passion and confidence in this sports i loved for 8 years.

8 years of committement and within a few days,

i'm losing the grip of it.

I feel like we were treated like thrash?

After usuage, we were disposed, BUT not even disposed correctly.

I remember the days i struggled,

and the only one i could really share was ms tan.

Till today, i would still confide in her.

She's just one of them i respect and would leave a legacy in my sec school years.

I remember how i tried to organise my cohord in the first year but i think i failed terribly.

It was like a silent scream, it was so torturous.

But still, i had to keep up with the pace and move on.

Somehow, i ask myself,

did the team become like this because i didn't put in my 100%?

Was it because it was in the beginning that i wasn't firm enough?

I've always remembered Mrs Chan's words;

a leader is always lonely.

We have to make unpopular decisions.

And i remember the part where she asked for the team to cooperate along the way.

I've consulted in many leaders,

and many had the same answer, the same conclusion.

I guess it's enough of my ramblings here,

cause i guess there would be internal discussion in some.

CONCLUSION;

i guess i'll either lock up this blogger or create another blogger for SCHOOL LIFE,

this blog here, i have too much info here.

And people starts to wander off in topics and gossips.

So i guess this'll be a really boring blogg soon, only school life.

As for the other which's been created for privacy,

i guess its just for me, myself and i.

And mybe i could let it all out.

Or maybe i just have a private one, no time for all these.

Goodbye world.

over and out 8:58 AM